“When you say yes to others, make sure you are not saying no to yourself.” ~Paulo Coelho
There it is again. Another person asks me for help. There’s a sharp pull inside of me to stop what I am doing and give.
And the internal struggle comes up.
I should just say yes and help them. What’s it take to write out a few text lines? An extra phone call? It’s not so bad, I tell myself. You are, after all, a caregiver.
My internal voice is so strong. It has been with me for a long time, this voice.
Then I feel my shoulders tense. I feel my breath begin to shorten. And a lightheaded feeling takes over. These are my early warning signs that I am taking on too much.
It has taken me some time to realize that this is what happens when I take on a lot and say yes—and that there is a significant cost to me. It stops me from getting my work done. I am not engaged and present when I am playing with my children. I am short with my husband. It derails my priorities. And it stops me from looking after myself.
Self-loathing is that underlying feeling that we are just not good: not good enough, not good at this, not good at that, not good at – or for –much of anything. It can be subtle, we may habitually compare ourselves to others, for instance, constantly finding fault with ourselves and putting ourselves down, with no real awareness that there is anything amiss. Or, we may listen intently to our critical inner voice while it scolds and berates us, telling us how embarrassing, stupid, or insensitive we are; refusing to challenge it even while we suffer from it.
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy is an integrative psychotherapy approach that has been extensively researched and proven effective for the treatment of trauma. EMDR is a set of standardized protocols that incorporates elements from many different treatment approaches. As EMDR is a mental health intervention, it should only be offered by properly trained and licensed mental health clinicians. EMDRIA does not condone or support indiscriminate uses of EMDR such as a "do-it-yourself" virtual therapy.
“Without music, life would be a mistake”, said Nietzsche, and he wasn’t entirely wrong because we have a natural instinct that leads us to follow the rhythm of the music. In fact, most children move and clap their hands when they hear a song they like. It is a spontaneous response related to our need to communicate and express our emotions through the movement and the body.
There is no doubt that music is a universal language and everyone, except the people who suffer from amusia, is able to appreciate and enjoy it. In fact, it was discovered that people of different cultures react emotionally in the same way when listening to different types of music. So, it is no coincidence that anthropological studies indicate that groups who were more likely to survive were those who had developed a particular dance and were able to share their feelings dancing.
Of course, music and dance not only serve as social glue, but are also very useful for our physical and mental health. Recent studies revealed that one of the keys to happiness and satisfaction is right on the dance floor.
What if I told you that science has figured out a way to eliminate your risk of heart disease if you are under the age of 55, and halve your risk of heart disease if you are over the age of 65, without reducing the amount of fat you eat or alcohol you drink?
Sign me up, right?!
Well, a small town of Italian immigrants in Roseto, Pennsylvania, inadvertently figured out how to do this and the results have been scientifically confirmed and validated.
The Adverse Childhood Study found that survivors of childhood trauma are up to 5,000 percent more likely to attempt suicide, have eating disorders, or become IV drug users. Dr. Vincent Felitti, the study's founder, details this remarkable and powerful connection.
To celebrate her incredible life, we’ve selected 101 of our favorite Louise Hay Affirmations
Our beloved friend and Hay House founder Louise Hay transitioned peacefully in her sleep on August 30, 2017 at age 90. Louise was an incredible visionary and advocate. Everyone who had the privilege to meet her, either in person, or through her words, felt her passion for serving others.
“I have come to this planet to learn to love myself more, and to share that love with all those around me,” Louise wrote.